The Hog Blog

So to my thesis: More Farting = Less Sex I received some very interesting emails.

A typical email was this quick note from a woman remarking:

“You’re right. good for you.. and for her”

But THEN I get an angry rant from THIS guy:

“I am married, I fart around my wife and daughter all the time, I also get lots of sex, and 2 times a week is not a lot, how about twice a day and sometime more.

“I wake up and see my wife off after we have fun and then when I get home, and sometime before bed, so your linear reference to farting equals less sex is not valid.”

So I wrote him back:

“Thanks for the email!

“Well, I was joking about the twice a week being a lot of sex. I thought that was about average: 2-3 times a week. You are an incredibly lucky guy that your wife gives you that much sex. I think you in the .00001% of all guys. Wow. That is freakin’ awesome.

“Perhaps your farts contain some irresistible pheromones!

“Unfortunately for me, MY farts smell like a sweaty skunk simmering in a bath tub of raw sewage.”

So now I’m wondering, maybe it has only been the experience of me and my friends where farting leads to less sex.

Maybe girls want the whole “bad boy” image.

And bad boys fart around their women. These middle aged bad boys may not ride a motorcycle, but it SOUNDS like they do.

So does farting lead to MORE sex, or less sex?

The winners of these 2 games advance to the National MILF Championships!

Vote carefully! Give a good reason explaining your MILF of choice!

Game 1: Pamela Anderson vs. Melania Trump

Game 2:  Christine Taylor vs. Heidi Klum

For pictures, see the original article.

New York Newsday reports that the New York City health department plans to develop a “memorable” wrapper for its free condoms that it distributes.

Great. I can see it now. On the condom wrapper is The Statue of Liberty. But her torch has been replaced with a giant dildo.

What will the artwork be? Maybe the Empire State Building covered in a condom?

New York City Tour Guide: The Empire State Building is 102 stories, of course that doesn’t count the Reservoir Tip. The Empire State Building is ribbed for your pleasure…