Dating Advice Man. Relationship Advice + Twisted Humor. Good Advice from HogWild. Jokes.  HOGWILD.NET  expert dating advice Relationship Advice.

| EXPERT DATING ADVICE | DATING ADVICE | DATING COACH | MEMBERS | STORE | FUNNY PICTURES | FUNNY RANTS | COMEDY VIDEOS | DATING ADVICE MAN | CARTOONS | CHATS | GAMES | LINKS | COMEDY SHOWS | CONTACT | JOIN NOW |

Expert Dating Advice
Funny MySpace Pictures
Funny Rants /Jokes
Comedy Videos
News
Dating Advice Man
Cartoons
Chats
Games
Comedy Shows
Contact/Email Me
Free Newsletter
Links
Dating Coach
 Subscribe in a reader
Professional Dating Advice
Crazy T-Shirts
Watch my dating advice videos or improve your dating with dating coach HogWild.

How to give a Girl a Kiss she'll NEVER Forget How can I stop being clingy and needy? What are your Rules for Dating? How do you flirt over email or text message? How do I get a girl attracted to me? Does this guy like me or not?! How do I know if I'm really in love? How do I get a guy more attracted to me? Why do nice guys finish last? Neither of us has made the first move. Should I make a move or wait for him?www.hogwild.net

Get Instant Access to over 300 helpful + hilarious dating advice videos you can't find anywhere else! *** Join the HogWild Relationship Revolution! ***

Hi Hog,

A guy friend and I are getting really close and I've developed feelings for him.

A mutual male friend did some "recon" and apparently this guy thinks I'm super cool and really likes me... but not like that.

It seems like none of the guys I like ever like me and the ones that do like me, I'm not attracted to.

Meanwhile this guy is wonderful and caring and a great friend who goes out of his way for me, but we also have different values and he's leaving town to go back to school soon.

So I'm trying to figure out if it's that he doesn't find me attractive, or if it's that he just can't see it working out.

I'm having a hard time accepting that he's just not into me, which, from a rational perspective, is the likeliest explanation. It just hurts. What do I do?

-E

Hog's Relationship Advice:

Do what everyone else does... hook up with some other person --- then as you're playing, uh, leap-frog, imagine that this person in your bed is the person you like.

No. That's terrible. But people do it. I admit that I've done it. In fact, I was imagining that she was someone else and she was imagining that I was someone else. It was like some sort of sad imaginary 0rgy.

As humans, we all need to connect with others. We need to love. And sometimes the pain of missing that causes us to act in foolish ways. In the words of the poet Jewel:

You took your coat off and stood in the rain
You were always crazy like that
I watched from my window
Always felt I was outside looking in on you

And in the words of another romantic poet, Eazy-E:

It's like that and it's like this
I took her to tha pad and we started tah kiss
Now my d!ck's on hard ya know what I'm thinkin'
Took tha panties off and the ***** was stinkin'

What Ms. Jewel and Mr. E are trying to tell us is that we long for emotional and physical intimacy. And we'll do crazy things in the pursuit like stand in the rain or fornicate with a person who has serious body odor issues.

Whether or not this guy likes you is irrelevant. It doesn't matter. He's not right for you. How do I know that? Because you said that! You said that you have different values.

It's okay to be in a relationship with someone who is different from you.

Good Differences:

You like vanilla. He likes chocolate.

Bad Differences:

You like apples. He likes sex with prostitutes.

Differences can be awesome, especially if the other person has traits that you admire. That's great! Your partner is supposed to inspire you to become a better person.

But having different values will cause serious conflict. For instance: if your #1 value is family but his #1 value is kidnapping babies for ransom... you two are not compatible.

At some point, you will want to have children and he will be booking a flight to Colombia.

Values are the beliefs you hold deep inside. He may value excitement and adventure while you value feeling safe. Well, in the long run this will lead to conflict because he will want to do crazy new things and "take a chance" and you will want to get a kitten.

It's very important that when you pick someone to share your life with (close friend or relationship) that they have similar values.

I'm not saying that your boyfriend should be your clone. You two should have the IMPORTANT things in common. And the things you DON'T have in common should be things that you RESPECT about him.

Listen, you could get this guy if you really wanted (assuming that he is not repulsed by you.) I'm guessing that you are an attractive girl since you said you have other guys interested in you.

But you should not go for a guy who only satisfies your v@ginal needs. Unless of course, you only want him for the purpose of satisfying your little Ms. Pac-Man.

You may find that over time your values change. Or his values change. That's natural. As we get older, different things are important to us.

MY MOST IMPORTANT VALUES AT AGE 8

1 - making my parents proud

2 - learning

3 - ice cream

MY MOST IMPORTANT VALUES AT AGE 23

1 - achievement

2 - being responsible

3 - sexual intercourse

MY MOST IMPORTANT VALUES TODAY

1 - being happy

2 - faith

3 - ice cream

You can also DECIDE to change your values. But that's something you need to do for yourself. Not for him. Changing yourself to fit someone else will eventually make you resent the other person. Changing for someone else is actually a very selfish act. Because you are deceiving the other person into thinking you are someone that you are not. And eventually you will go back to your "real" self. And the other person will feel like they don't even know you.

So now what?

Smile! You've discovered something very important about yourself! You require more in a man than simply a big car and a cool pen!s.

NOTE: Adjectives may have been swapped to protect men's feelings.

Now you know what to look for!

As far as being attractive, not all men will find you attractive. It's impossible. Even the world's hottest supermodels do not appeal to all men. Personally, I'm more attracted to a girl with healthy curves than to a tall skinny girl with big feet.

NOTE TO TALL SKINNY GIRLS WITH BIG FEET: No offense. It's just that if I wanted to date a someone with big feet and a tall skinny girly body then I would date myself!

Put this guy in the Friend Zone. But only if you can handle being friends with him. Be honest with yourself. Don't stay in close contact with him if you are secretly trying to win him. Yes, you will eventually win him. 99% of the time, if a woman REALLY wants a man, she will win him. But you will be winning a man who you are not compatible with. So in the end, you are only hurting yourself.

This guy has set a higher standard for you. So focus on finding a new guy who meets those higher standards but who also shares your values.

For me, I have a few values that are super-important to me. If a girl doesn't share these values then I know we are not a good fit.

I can usually discover this within 60 seconds.

My #1 Value is having a sense-of-humor about life. Duh. If a girl is so serious that she can't make fun of herself... forget it. If she can make fun of ME (in a playful way) then I know she's awesome.

You know why? Because to make fun of me means that she's been paying attention to the details of my life and personality. When I tease/make fun of girls it is a huge compliment to them because I make fun of some little thing she said or some quirk in her personality. And it's NEVER in a mean way. Always in a playful, fun way.

If you're going to be in a relationship, you're planning to be with this other person for a long time. Do you want to spend that time laughing or arguing?

Right, you want to spend that time flopping around n@ked like salmon on land.

But how will you fill the OTHER 23 hours and 57 minutes of the day?

Ask YOUR Relationship / Dating Question!  More HogWild Dating Advice Man