MC OBESE - the Fattest Rapper EVER!

Get HogWild! Stand-up Comedy at your Campus or Business Convention. Clubs, Colleges, and Funeral Parlors email hogwild@hogwild.net for booking info!

MC OBESE!

The Fat Boys, Heavy D, Notorious B.I.G., Fat Joe, Big Pun . . . HipHop has a history of Fat Men with amazing lyrical talent. Now, Rapping exclusively for HogWild! Entertainment . . . it's the fattest rapper EVER . . . the HipHip Super Heavy Weight . . . MC OBESE!

Don't be thinkin' this picture of MC OBESE is bootleg, he really IS Fat Albert's cousin.

scary? not as scary as seeing MC Obese's naked gutski!

MC Obese will never become a skeleton. In fact, even his BONES are obese.

My head is as empty as Sandra Bullock's.

The Evil Gourd of Darkness.

flicker flicker

MC Obese can't hold a candle because his heavy breathing always blows it out.

Scooby! Where are you!

Please, MC Obese ain't scared of no Haunted House! That's nothin' compared to his apartment building in the Bronx!

Goddammy! That looks good!

Representin' for ma Beefy Boyz! Tha Compton Cookie Monsterz, Brooklyn Baked Beanz, and The Dirty South Devil Food Cake!

Your Ad Here

Let me rip this beat up. Cuz only one thing scarier than All Hallow’s Eve. And that’s All Summer’s Eve. Damn I hate those douche commercials on TV! Almost makes me lose my appetite. Almost. A’ight! Let me be like Halle Berry and bust this hit then run.

MC Obese is the name
Pork Chops are the game
Halloween freestyle from this fat ass MC
Beat yo butt with no questions like LAPD
M.D.’s are amazed
At the fields I’ve grazed
Eatin’ wheat and maize
In a chocoholic haze
October got 31 days
But it’s that last one when I get crazed
Trick or treatin’ in the ghetto
Suckin’ down marshmallows
Wearin’ a big green garbage bag
With guns and an American flag
Yeah that’s my costume, I am a tank
Trick or treat bitch, now give up the bank
Run all those treats, gimme all your candy
I even want the toothbrushes and pennies from granny
MC Obese keep it hammy
Did a bid in the slammy
Sucka homo try to do me in the fanny
And when he whipped out his jammy
I hit him with the wammy
Busted him so bad he said God-dammy!
That should teach a sucka for tryin’ to run up in my clammy
This tish is too hot, MC Obese never get the Grammy
Horror tales is what I tell
Gravy poured out my leg last time I fell

THE BIGGEST, THE BADDEST
THE SCARIEST, THE FATTEST
MC OBESE!!

I been in this game since ‘96
3 years after Al Gore invented the hip-hop mix
I stay in it cuz I need my fix
Getting’ treats from trix
Check this:
It was a dark night I was chillin’ up in my apartment
Lightning and thunder that’s when it all started
My whole tish was shaking, even my TV
But it did not bother me
‘til it busted open my f-r-i-d-g-e!
Damn homeboy, what was goin’ down?
Even the roaches was scared, headin’ out of town
Well this big bad brown
Heavyweight crown
Hardcore and round
Rotund rapper
Don’t get scared by a little pit-patter
But when the window glass went shatter
I almost lost my bladder
But it don’t matter
Long as I got my food so I can get fatter
But that’s when I heard this witch cackle,

no more food for you Obese! HAHAHA! Hey! Stop trying to eat my nose! My nose is NOT a twinkie!
“No more food for you!” then a candle went crackle

Jack-o-lantern schemin’
Maybe I was dreamin’
I turned around, I saw a mummy’s head steamin’

THE BIGGEST, THE BADDEST
THE GHASTLIEST, THE FATTEST
MC OBESE!!!

Full moon, heard a werewolf howl
Wet my pants again, somebody get me a towel
Can’t figure out the puzzle, "Pat I’d like to buy a vowel"
Heard the scream of an owl
Like the inside of a taxi, I was smellin’ somethin’ foul
Damn, my whole house was haunted with somethin’ freaky
I’m hearin’ drip drip but I ain't got no pipes leaky
Yo, that’s blood! MY blood!
And here comes a pack of pitbulls straight out the mud
It's looking sad for this street singer so stout
I’m like the Baha Men screamin’, “Who let the dogs out?”
They barkin’ at me, I was gonna die
But I could only think “I wish I had a chocolate scooter pie”
Vampire bat flyin’ overhead
But now I’m getting’ angry cuz I ain’t been fed
Look to my right there’s a talkin’ head
That’s it, no one messes with my meal time
Straight up, I challenged the evil demons to a battle rhyme!
I said I know this Halloween stuff is all a myth
I ain’t Mystikal but "SHOW ME WHAT YOU WORKIN WITH!"
Then poof, he appeared,
It was the ghost of a rapper I ain’t seen in years
Big baggy pants, in it for the glamour
Who was the evil spirit? MC HAMMER!

2 Legit! 2 Legit to make another Hit! Hey Hey!
He was dancin’ all ugly and he tried to lyrically flex
If I wore his parachute pants they would be spandex
I was like damn you skinny
I should hit you on the chinny
Put a crush on you like Kevin had for Winnie
Ring the bell because it’s time for dinny
I said Mr. Hammer you may have a platinum record but you’re not spooky
In fact, your career is dookie
I’ll crush you like a cookie
I’m a big beef burger, you’re a little French fry
I’m the Great Pumpkin, and you’re a slice of pumpkin pie
Then I took out my knife put it right by his crotchy
This fake fool was sweatin’ in his silk Versace
Do you wanna be the next Headless Horseman?
Of course then
He quit and gave me the candy corn and lollipops too
I looked him straight in the eye, and I went BOO!
HA HA HA, I laughed like a menace
But the last laugh was had by the Dentist
Cuz MC Obese gobbled all those Snickers and M&M’s
Twizzlers, Milk Way, Skittles, Nerds and even the Candy Apple stems
That Dentist said show me the money like he was Cuba Gooding
So learn from me: Never fall asleep while eating strawberry pudding

THE BIGGEST, THE BADDEST
GINGIVITIS, THE FATTEST
MC OBESE!!

And I’m out like the Atlanta Braves in October. Yo, and word to L.L. Cool J. You ain’t the G.O.A.T. you just a goat
Ain't NO ONE ever be fatter than me, I even got cellulite on my scrote!

Bronx Blubber Posse in full effect.

ONE! Thousand pounds baby!

hogwild.net semi-hilarious comedy every day